How to Inspire People with a TEDx Talk

The TEDxYouth@PVPHS Program | March 22, 2019

Is giving a TEDx talk on your bucket list?

It’s definitely on mine. TEDx talks are independently organized under a free license from TED. This global speaking platform gets its name from a 1984 conference where technology, entertainment and design converged.

So many great TED talks have inspired me that I was eager to try to do the same. I spoke often in the corporate world and in the community, always enjoying the opportunity to impact people’s lives in a positive way.

But where to begin on a TEDx talk?

For me, it started with listening to TED talks during drive time. Then I read TED Talks: The Official Guide to Public Speaking by TED curator Chris Anderson. And I went to TEDWomen and got to see speakers up close.

As this blog took shape as an exploration of how people boost their careers through social media, I started sketching out ideas for a talk. Here’s what I learned on the journey.

Landing your talk. Convinced that my talk, Why Everyone Needs a Social Media Strategy for Their Career, would be of interest to just about anyone (oh, the folly of my thoughts), I applied to speak at a local event. I watched previous talks at the event and linked the “idea worth spreading” in my talk to the proposed theme.

But there was no response. Not even a rejection email. Just … nothing.

Of course, I finally realized, it’s like applying for a job. It rarely works to apply online. Your application just goes into a black hole from which it never emerges.

It also reminded me of one of my life mantras: don’t apply for stuff. Instead, let people find you. They tend to be more interested that way, and you don’t have to do as much convincing (aka, selling).

What happened next? An acquaintance was kind enough to introduce me to the curator of another event. We jumped on a call. It did not go well. I hadn’t prepared in the right way. My idea fell flat.

For a while I let this simmer on the back burner.

One day I checked Messenger.  There was an intriguing message from Sara Robinson, someone I knew from our local community. Her daughter’s service learning leadership class in high school was putting on a second annual TEDxYouth event. They were looking for inspiring speakers. Sara said she thought of me.

Was I interested?

Um, YES!

The official term for what happened might be called “inbound marketing.” It’s all about sharing content in different ways. Ultimately, that content may interest people in coming to you. Blog posts, YouTube videos, articles, speeches and more would fall into this category.

In addition to this blog, I was the inspiration chair in a group called National Charity League. At the beginning of each monthly meeting, I gave a short inspirational talk. I wanted that role because it was a difficult time in my life, and I thought I could inspire myself by inspiring others.

Of my various community roles, this was an all-time favorite. And I never dreamed it would lead to the chance to give a TEDx talk. Which just goes to show you never know where actions you take today might lead in the future.

You don’t have to know how you’re going to make a dream come true at the outset. You just have to declare to yourself that you will do it. Somehow. The “how” will make itself clear as you begin to take steps toward your goal.

Creating your talk. TED talks are about ideas worth spreading. Each talk is about a single idea. You have 18 minutes or less to tell the story of that idea.

My original talk was about why you need a social media strategy for your career. The feedback I got was that it sounded like a sales pitch. While that was not my intent what I wanted to do was equip people with the tools to do it themselves it was helpful to know that’s how it came across to one curator.

When the TEDxYouth opportunity came up, it seemed like the ideal audience to pivot the focus. Teens use social media to stay in touch and share who they are. What they may not consider is that social media can be a powerful and fun way to learn throughout their lives.

That became my idea worth spreading: how social media can make you a #lifelonglearner. Access to anything you want to know is no further away than the social media apps on your phone. You can learn about any topic you choose, learn about the social media platforms themselves, and help others learn about you. A transcript of the talk is in a previous blog post.

Getting feedback on your talk. The iterative nature of the TEDx process is something that’s ideal for all speaking engagements. I did an initial read for the students on the TEDx committee almost two months before the event. We were packed into a small office adjacent to the main classroom, with the students sitting on the floor and me presenting from the notes on my iPad.

The next session was an evening presentation over dinner with all the speakers. There were six student speakers and two adults me and a well-known English teacher and softball coach. We created small groups after the presentations to give each other feedback. I was impressed by the caliber of the speakers and how much heart and soul they were putting into their talks.

After that, we each came to class two more times to deliver our talks. With every visit we got additional ideas and suggestions. It was an incredibly thorough way to do it. We all improved our talks with continuous feedback and iteration of our talks.

And we all benefited from the great leadership of Heather Myrick. She initiated the school’s service learning leadership class that raises awareness, promotes compassion, and takes action in local and global communities. She had incredibly insightful feedback for each speaker, along with much encouragement.

Memorizing your talk. Memorizing a 1,700-word talk is no easy feat. It surely would have been faster in my college days, when I was used to cramming large amounts of material into my brain right before finals week. But with the passage of time and the sheer volume of information we encounter on a typical day that takes up precious brain space, memorization proved difficult.

I tried recording my talk as a video and listening to it before I fell asleep. Research says this is a good way to make information stick. The various sleep cycles are supposed to solidify the learning. I also tried listening to the recording during drive time.

But what ultimately worked for me was repetition, repetition and more repetition. I’d memorize one paragraph by repeating it aloud multiple times as I paced across my office. Once I had one paragraph down, I’d add the next one. Eventually I worked up to a page. Then two pages. And three pages. Ultimately I got to all four pages.

I must have repeated that talk 200 times, and I still didn’t feel like I fully had it. I felt like if I paused during the delivery, I’d forget where I was and be unable to remember the next line.

What was it that made it fairly simple to deliver the talk while I was driving in my car, while taking the stage introduced a whole new level of challenge?

The difference really was the thought of being judged. Yet I had to remind myself of what I often coached others on in the corporate world people in the audience are rooting for you. They want you to succeed.

Talking yourself off the ledge. Procrastination is a problem for me. My tendencies toward perfection make me put off tasks and the emotional pain of not feeling like I’m measuring up to the standards I set for myself. Of course, this just compounds the problem, because then there isn’t enough time to create something as good as I would like.

When I finally deemed my talk almost good enough to share with my family members, the actual event wasn’t that far off. I felt like they were underwhelmed with my delivery, to say the least. To their credit, they had some great ideas and suggestions.

The problem for me was that it was difficult to memorize my talk in the first place. Now I was going to need to rewrite areas and re-memorize it. But then I remembered a great conversation between two TED speakers on a podcast called The Tim Ferriss Show.

In an episode on overcoming fear and embracing creativity, Susan Cain and Tim Ferriss talked about their experiences preparing for the TED stage. In each case, some late-breaking feedback caused them to make last-minute changes to their talks. The pressure was intense. Yet the end results made their talks all the better.

Having insight into others’ experiences helped me talk myself off the ledge, along with some much-needed encouragement from my husband, Kevin.

Enjoying the experience. The day of the event I must have run through the whole talk about 50 times. Or at least it felt that way. Yet when I would think though specific sections, my mind would often draw a blank. I started to freak out a bit, wondering if I’d be able to remember and deliver the whole talk.

I call these moments the speeding train syndrome. That’s when you’ve done a tremendous amount of preparation and the deadline is looming, but you never feel fully prepared. At that point, there isn’t that much more you can do, because the train will continue speeding along toward its destination.

This was when I decided I had to surrender to the timeline, do my best, and try to enjoy the experience. If not for me, then for the sake of the audience. As a TEDxYouth event, the size of the audience was limited. But I was thrilled that my husband, our two children, our daughter’s friend (both serendipitously home for spring break from college), and one of my friends were able to attend.

We were going to have some fun together. That’s what I told myself as I walked onto the stage and took my place in the middle of the TEDx red circular carpet. And I think we did! The parts where my family members had given feedback and suggestions were the moments that inspired some laughter from the audience.

Amplifying the experience. One moment I was waiting in the wings, ready to go onstage, with butterflies in my stomach. Then I stepped onto the stage, into the light. And I began.

Before I knew it, I was done. I remembered my talk as I’d practiced it time and time again.

What next? The first thing was to offer encouragement to the speakers in the green room who would follow me. It was a sight to see a group of people individually pacing the room, practicing their talks.

The next day I shared my talk transcript in a blog post. I wanted to reach a larger audience after the weeks, days and hours of effort in fine tuning it into an idea worth spreading.

And I wanted to share the experience with you, if this is a dream of yours too. If you have an idea worth sharing, there are TEDx events all over the world. I encourage you to seek one out and share your idea. The world needs you!

Lead with the Lead

Start with your key sentence. Your point. Your theory. Your ask.

Whether it’s a talk, a text or an email, lead with what’s most important.

Three things got me thinking about this.

First, how do we grab people’s attention from the start? I heard two days of incredible talks at TEDWomen 2016 this month. The speakers did not start with, “Hi, I’m glad to be here and I’m excited about what I’m going to share with you and I’d like to thank a few people before I get started.”

No, they grabbed us with their opening words. With a bold statement or a question or a story. Here are examples from some of my favorite TED talks.

“So I want to start by offering you a free no-tech life hack, and all it requires of you is this: that you change your posture for two minutes.” So begins Amy Cuddy‘s talk, Your body language shapes who you are.

“What makes a great leader today?” There’s no mistaking what Roselinde Torres will address in her talk, What it takes to be a great leader.

“It’s the fifth time I stand on this shore, the Cuban shore, looking out at that distant horizon, believing, again, that I’m going to make it all the way across that vast, dangerous wilderness of an ocean.” Diana Nyad grabs the audience right at the beginning of her story in Never, ever give up.

Second, how do we help busy people easily respond us? Quite simply, by putting the key information in the opening words of our emails and texts.

Beyond putting your main message in the subject line, use your first 10 to 12 words to make your point.

Many people have email preview screens that show these words. Make the most of that space by getting to the point. Because your recipient may not read anything else.

Third, how do we spot the key idea in any interaction? When a meeting ends, can you summarize the most important point in a single sentence? What’s the headline? The tweet? The snap?

Take a few minutes at the end of a conversation or meeting to identify the one key takeaway. Share it with your colleagues.

Given the complexity of many projects and the extensive collaboration that’s required to meet goals, this helps others see the forest for the trees.

This keeps a team focused on what’s most important. It guides their actions. And it increases the likelihood of success.

How do you keep your lead front and center?

What If?

fullsizerender

Have you ever spent a day trying not to cry?

For me, there are always moments that prompt tears. Our national anthem at a school event. The doxology at church (with the gender-neutral, more inclusive lyrics for me). Pomp and Circumstance at a graduation ceremony.

Thank goodness for sunglasses. Because one of the last things I want to do is reveal my emotions in public.

After this week’s experience, though, I wonder if that’s because I go to extremes to avoid being labeled as an emotional woman.

But it may be pointless to try, because as a woman I’m going to be labeled anyway. And I can’t control that.

I can only control my own thoughts and my own actions. And there’s power in that.

What made me want to cry for an entire day this week? None other than the TEDWomen 2016 conference. Phenomenal speakers with ideas worth sharing took the stage, with the theme of “it’s about time.”

I was drawn to TED for many reasons. As a communicator. As a lover of ideas. As someone profoundly saddened by our national conversations – on race, on religion, on gender, on guns, on others. 

As in, people who don’t share the same worldview. People who can’t or won’t listen to each because they’re so busy screaming about how the other group is wrong. And not even wrong, but deluded, dumb and not deserving. Of a voice. Of dignity. Of empathy.

What if our conversations in the world could be more like what I saw, heard and felt on the TED stage?

  • A famous singer talked about channeling her pain from the abusive household where she grew up into her music.
  • An actress shared how she fought back against cyberbullying and violence.
  • A couple who work to improve a Nairobi slum spoke of the randomness of how privilege or poverty are bestowed.
  • A journalist and author talked about the death threats she received when she came out as a lesbian.
  • A rape survivor and the perpetrator shared the stage and their agonizing experiences.

Throughout each electrifying talk, a common question emerged: what can I do?

What if I made it a point to seek out different points of view? To listen to a different newscast or podcast. To get out of my social media stream and hear different voices. To seek out people with more diverse backgrounds and life experiences.

What if I spoke up more forcefully to inappropriate comments? The next time someone says something offensive about another group of people, I will ask why they think that and why they would say that.

What if I was more curious about people and their stories? What has their journey through life been like? What experiences shaped them? What do they struggle with? What brings them joy?

What if I used every means of power available to me for good? How can I encourage people to reach higher? How can I help people expand their networks? How can I empower people to open doors to more opportunity?

What if I took action? While I don’t know exactly what that is yet, I do know it starts with better educating myself on multiple perspectives about what’s going on in the world. Kimberle Crenshaw‘s eye-opening #SayHerName is where I’ll start.

Hearing from so many inspiring people reminded me that each of us can make a difference in the lives of others, every day.

As Kennedy Odede said during his talk with Jessica Posner Odede, “We can’t walk in each other’s shoes, but we can walk together.”

Who are you walking with?