by Caroline Leach | Aug 30, 2018 | Careers, Leadership, Work/Life
What 5-minute action can you take at work today that will pay huge dividends and possibly change someone’s life?
Write a thank you note.
Yup, a thank you note. It can be by email, text, card or direct message. The medium doesn’t matter. What matters is taking the time to share with a colleague what you appreciate about them.
Science says so. Gratitude research is on the rise, according to Heather Murphy reporting in The New York Times. A recent study covered in Psychological Science asked participants to “write a short ‘gratitude letter’ to a person who had affected them in some way.”
Many of the note recipients said “they were ‘ecstatic,’ scoring the happiness rating at 4 of 5. The senders typically guessed they’d evoke a 3.”
The major finding of Dr. Amit Kumar at the University of Texas at Austin? “People tend to undervalue the positive effect they can have on others for a tiny investment of time.”
Dilbert creator Scott Adams put it well in his bestseller, How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big: Kind of the Story of My Life.
“Adults are starved for a kind word,” Adams wrote. “When you understand the power of honest praise (as opposed to bullshitting, flattery, and sucking up), you realize that withholding it borders on immoral. If you see something that impresses you, a decent respect to humanity insists you voice your praise.”
What else says so? My own experience.
Today is my last day at AT&T, which was DIRECTV before that. (Note: opinions expressed in this blog are my own.) It’s been a great run at a great company, and I’m excited to move on to the next stage of my work life. But it’s bittersweet to leave an incredible group of colleagues.
When my departure note went out, I thought a few people might reach out to say farewell.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the outpouring of appreciation. And thanks. And love.
(And in the #MeToo era with so much bad behavior, I must qualify that to note what I experienced was entirely professional and fully within the bounds of respectful and appropriate workplace behavior.)
What caught me completely by surprise is a stack of now-printed emails with thanks and good wishes that I’m saving for posterity. I share a few excerpts anonymously here, with the hope the writers do not mind and that their thoughts might inspire you to thank a colleague today, and every day …
Thank you for making us smile and wanting to do our jobs. You are an amazing leader who leads by example.
I always enjoyed your leadership and especially looked up to you in so many ways, hoping that I could be half of what you are in my lifetime.
Did you hear that?! That was the sound of my heart breaking. While our work together was short lived and limited (much to my dismay), you truly made an invaluable impact and for that I thank you.
On behalf of all the people you have inspired, but are probably unaware of, thanks for all you do.
It’s been my biggest pleasure and honor to work with you.
I’m sure you don’t remember me, but you had lunch with a small group of new hires during our onboarding. We had a lovely conversation and I was so impressed and grateful for how welcoming and inclusive you were with us.
You’ve had such a profound influence on my life and I am so grateful for that.
Wow.
I had no idea.
And maybe the people you work with have no idea either … of how talented, valued and appreciated they are. So I encourage you, every day, to share your thanks with at least one person. It reminds me of what a wise colleague, Andy Bailey, always used to say – start every meeting with recognition.
Here’s my love letter to all the amazing people I’ve worked with over the years, from a real-estate developer to what became Northrop Grumman, and from to DIRECTV to AT&T …
Friends,
You are the reason I enjoy coming to work every day.
You are my “why” for being at work … the purpose that is bigger than all of us. You bring the ideas, the inspiration and the innovation that make our teams a success. You make the seemingly impossible suddenly possible. You make the workday fun, yes fun.
There’s a lot of hard work behind what you do. But you take the high road every day, making your hard work appear effortless and going above and beyond to deliver for colleagues and customers.
I have learned so much from you, whether a new skill set in a new role or a better way to lead and engage people. Maya Angelou was on to something when she said that people won’t remember what you said or did, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel. You make me feel like anything is possible, that there is good in the world, and that the present and future are exciting places.
You have given me many gifts over the years. The most important ones? The feeling that I have made – and will continue to make – a difference. The knowledge that each of us leaves bigger footprints in the sands of time than we can ever know. That quite possibly is the best gift ever. It speaks to our humanity and our desire to be part of something larger than ourselves.
I am ever grateful, and I ask that you keep paying it forward.
Who has made a difference in your work life? Who will you reach out to today?
by Caroline Leach | Apr 20, 2016 | Learning
Heading into Peet’s this morning for coffee, my mind was going a mile a minute thinking about the day ahead. Meetings to attend. Calls to make. Actions to complete.
An unexpected ray of sunshine brightened my morning as I approached the store. A fellow coffee aficionado I’d seen there from time to time shared a thoughtful compliment with me as I walked by.
Wow. It made me pause. It made me smile. It brought a whole new aura to my day.
It reminded me of some wise words from Tony Schwartz, writing about appreciation in Harvard Business Review. “Feeling genuinely appreciated lifts people up,” he wrote.
He was talking about the workplace specifically as he advocated looking for opportunities to notice what others are doing right and being appreciative for their contributions.
This could be a positive twist on “if you see something, say something.” If you observe someone doing something great, take the initiative to recognize them for it. It could be a member of your team, a community acquaintance or the person standing next to you in line.
You never know what a difference you could make in someone’s day.
A colleague of mine, Andy Bailey, role models this at work. “Start every meeting with recognition,” he says. There’s a transformative power in beginning with gatherings this way. People feel more valued, the tone of the meeting is lighter and the time together becomes more productive.
Scott Adams takes the concept further in How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big. “Adults are starved for a kind word,” Adams wrote. “When you understand the power of honest praise, you realize that withholding it borders on terminal. If you see something that impresses you, a decent respect to humanity insists you voice your praise.”
Hear, hear!
by Caroline Leach | Apr 30, 2015 | Corporate Communications, Leadership
What are our deepest human cravings?
To feel that we are important. That we have something valuable to contribute. That we matter.
Tony Schwartz summed it up well in an HBR blog post called, The Only Thing that Really Matters.
“How we’re feeling — and most especially whether or not we feel acknowledged and appreciated — influences our behavior, consumes our energy and affects our decisions all day long,” Tony wrote.
“Our core emotional need is to feel valued,” he continued. “Without a stable sense of value, we don’t know who we are and we don’t feel safe in the world.”
That reminds me of a great TED talk by Simon Sinek, called Why good leaders make you feel safe.
(And as an aside, if you want something engaging to do during your commute, get the TED app and listen to a playlist of talks on a subject of interest. Work Smarter, Before Public Speaking and How to be a Great Leader are favorites.)
Back to Simon. He talks about the importance of creating trust among people and fostering a safe environment as a way to build up people and organizations.
The result? “When we feel safe inside the organization,” Sinek says, “we will naturally combine our talents and our strengths and work tirelessly to face the dangers outside and seize the opportunities.”
He describes leadership as a choice, not a title. Looking after your colleagues makes you a leader, Sinek says.
That can sometimes mean acknowledging a hard truth. The principal of my son’s school wrote a poignant email to parents the day that people across the country heard of the horrible tragedy at Sandy Hook.
“The randomness and unfairness of this event remind us the deeply troubling fact that we can never fully protect our loved ones,” he wrote. He named our unspeakable fear. Which made it just slightly less awful, to be reminded that we can’t, in fact, control everything. Even if, as humans, we would like to. And we strive to.
What does this have to do with communicating effectively with employees? With winning their hearts and minds? With showing people that they matter?
It means listening – to hopes as well as fears. It means building trust. It means showing by your actions that people are important. That they have value. That they are needed. And that they have an opportunity to be part of an inspiring vision that is bigger than themselves.
Two people I know are really good at this.
First is Joe Bosch, DIRECTV’s CHRO and my boss. He gets the HR team together frequently, and a tradition is his presentation of a “Bosch toolbox.” For an individual who’s done something notable, Joe invites them to the front of the room and reads his personal note on the box, which is filled with fun tools.
Second is Andy Bailey, who leads employee recognition on my team, with a focus on our frontline employees. Andy’s mantra to “start every meeting with recognition” is something I’m proud to experience every day as part of our culture at DIRECTV.
When the Myers Briggs personality types came up in conversation yesterday, it reminded me how many thinkers, versus feelers, are in leadership roles (myself among them as an ENTJ). And thinking is good for many important activities – strategy, operations, analytics and metrics, to name a few.
But people have to deliver on those strategies. And they’re more fired up to take that next hill if leaders and colleagues are touching people’s hearts as well as their minds. So people know they are appreciated. That they have value. That they matter.
That you matter.
Friends,
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