In taking your journey toward them, do you want a fun way of getting there?
Here’s an idea. Choose a theme word for your year.
What’s that? It’s a single word you pick to characterize the kind of year you want to have.
While there’s a lot going on the world that is beyond each of our individual control, there’s one area of life where we have complete control. And that’s ourselves. Our thoughts. Our decisions about how to choose to show up in the world. Our choices about how to respond to adversity or to good fortune.
Our thoughts and feelings are powerful forces. A theme word can help focus and channel them toward action to achieve our deepest desires.
As I shared at the beginning of another new year, a theme for your year can help you in four ways.
First is MOTIVATION. A theme is a personal rallying cry you can apply to everything you do, in social media and in real life. It can give you the motivation to take small steps toward your goals, day after day. Big things happen through small, consistent actions.
Second is FOCUS. A theme is a continual reminder of what’s important to you. And what’s not. It helps you decide in an instant if you’re spending your time in the most important ways to you — and with the people who are important in your life.
Third is INTEGRATION. A theme brings everything in your life together, both professional and personal. Your actions support and build on each other in an integrated way. It’s a powerful form of working smarter, not harder.
Fourth is MEANING. A theme gives purpose and meaning to every action you take. Your reason for choosing your theme gives you the “why” of your goals and actions. That makes you more likely to continue working toward them and ultimately achieving them.
When I wrote about theme words in two previous years, I was impressed and inspired by the words people shared with me as their own theme words. Opportunity. Strength. Momentum. Inspire. Feedback. Stretch. Courageous. Development. Fancy. Growth. And so many more.
2019 is my ninth year of having an annual theme. The first year, in 2011, was motivated by struggling with feelings of burnout after a particularly intense work project. The work was a success, but my life wasn’t.
So I embarked on a path of thinning out my commitments on my calendar, my clutter in my home and office, and even myself with better nutrition and exercise. That is how THINNING became my theme word.
Last year my theme was BUZZING. That requires a bit of explanation. The full story is in my post about 2018. But the quick story is that standout marketer and entrepreneur Seth Godin writing about about “buzzer management” inspired me.
Seth started the quiz team at his high school. But as he wrote, it “took me 30 years to figure out the secret of getting in ahead of others who also knew the answer (because the right answer is no good if someone else gets the buzz): You need to press the buzzer before you know the answer.”
He went on to say that once you buzz in, the answer will come to you. And even if it doesn’t, the penalty is small. He says “buzzing makes your work better, helps you dig deeper, and inspires you. The act of buzzing leads to leaping, and leaping leads to great work.”
I’m here to tell you that he was right. By picking buzzing as my theme last year, I spoke up and spoke out more often than I had in the past. I said things before I was fully ready. Of course, being a balanced risk taker, I backed up my buzzing with planning and acting and building a foundation in the direction I wanted to go.
And how did things turn out?
I’m happy to say I launched my own business, long a dream of mine, called The Carrelle Company. It grew out of this blog, a side gig I kicked off on New Year’s Day 2015. I’ve been observing and researching and writing about how people build their careers and companies through social media. Now I’m writing, consulting, speaking, and teaching about that as my new career.
One of the newer rituals I added this year was inspired by Danielle LaPorte, a soulful author, speaker, and entrepreneur. Her belief is that by being clear on our feelings, we can design our lives around taking actions that lead to feeling the way we want to feel most of the time.
At first this concept was a bit challenging for me. On the Myers-Briggs personality spectrum, I’m on the “thinking” rather than the “feeling” side, meaning that I prefer logic to emotion. Yet I yearned to feel differently than I did.
So I dipped into Danielle’s workbook to identify what she calls “core desired feelings.” After reflecting on I was grateful for and what wasn’t working, I eventually landed on five words that are my core desired feelings.
One of them is “creative.” Its definition of “originality of thought,” along with “inspired” and “visionary,” really spoke to my soul. Given that writing, blogging, consulting, speaking, and teaching all rest on a fountain of creativity, I was drawn to it as a core feeling.
As I thought about the most important thing for the coming year, it’s being as creative as I possibly can. That led naturally to my theme word for the year: CREATING.
One step at a time, I’m creating my new business. I’m writing a series of books on what successful people do in social media. I’m developing social media plans for clients. I’m preparing for several speaking engagements. And I’m designing a social media class to teach in the spring.
I look forward to sharing much of this creativity with you through my blog and my books.
Every day, I’ll be focused on creating.
How about you? What theme word will inspire and integrate your year?
Here are a few ideas to get your creative thoughts flowing.
What problem are you trying to solve? Start with what you’re trying to accomplish. Make sure your problem statement is well defined. This question has become a perennial favorite ever since I took a McKinsey & Company course called Strategy 101 at DIRECTV.
What would success look like? This takes a page from Stephen Covey‘s principle to begin with the end in mind. What perfect or better world state could exist? What is lacking today that would make the world a better place? If you can imagine it, then you can create it.
How many ideas can you come up with? Start by making a list of 10 ideas. Save the judgments for later. Just jot down ideas as quickly as you can. Then explore them further to see how they could play out to solve the problem you’re tackling. What would you have to do to make them work?
How can you expose yourself to new concepts? What are you reading? If you mainly read non-fiction, try fiction. If you read business magazines, try something in the sciences. Check out a new report from the Institute for the Future. Listen to a TED talk or playlist.
Who’s in your network? How diverse is your network? Get to know some new people, especially cross generationally. That’s one of the things I love about the TV show Younger – the friendships across generations, with different perspectives on life.
How can you vary your routine? Our brains crave novelty and variety. So drive a different way to work. Take up a new sport. Go on an artist’s date (with thanks to Julia Cameron for that fun and fabulous way to “restock the well” of creative thinking). Think about what you usually do, and consciously do something else.
This week, on a family vacation, we mixed up our routine. We watching our son’s team play baseball in beautiful San Diego. We met new parents and players on the team. We tried new restaurants.
My husband and I went to a new yoga class we’ve been wanting to attend. We went paddle boarding and tried to figure out how to navigate the waves beyond the marina where we’ve been learning.
“Find Your Inspiration” greeted us on the tram today as we arrived at the Getty Center in Los Angeles.
What a great way to build community. It created connections through social media with #GettyInspired.
Not only was I inspired myself and in how my family responded to our visit, but I could also see how others experienced this architectural and artistic treasure.
There was a common experience in being part of something bigger than ourselves. This is a hallmark of all storied brands, and the Getty sets a great example.
The Getty has been the site of many a previous inspiration for me. The DIRECTV annual leadership development program. A National Charity League gathering for an architecture tour. Many family visits, including today’s.
Today was by far my favorite. We checked into a tour of the collection’s highlights. It was led by a passionate and knowledgeable docent who ably linked art history with current events.
We learned how Rembrandt, who never traveled more than 40 miles from his home, had haunted flea markets of his day to collect props used in his paintings.
We learned how Vincent van Gogh painted Irises, the vibrant view outside his window in his first week at the sanitarium in Saint-Remy, France.
And it was only a few hours later that we heard the news of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia‘s passing. Whatever your politics, it underscores how each day is really all that each of us has.
When the world seems full of rejection, look for bright spots. And make the most of the them.
I choose to see rejections simply as milestones along my journey. They aren’t major rejections. A community involvement role here. A professional association board membership there. And some others along the way.
One bright spot is I got the volunteer job I wanted this year in National Charity League. I’m the inspiration chair for the Palos Verdes chapter. I give a short talk each month to inspire my fellow members.
We’re parents serving communities along with our daughters in middle and high school. We’re part of a national organization fostering mother-daughter relationships in a philanthropic organization committed to community service and giving 1 million hands-on volunteer hours annually.
And we’re busy – juggling children, careers and community.
So my inspiration this month began with a collective exhale. We were gathered on a scenic September evening at the seaside cliffs of the Point Vicente Interpretive Center.
And here’s what I said.
By a show of hands, how many of you –
Have more texts, emails, pings and dings than you can answer?
Have more calendar commitments than you can ever do?
Feel like everyone but you leads a charmed life on Facebook and Instagram?
Well, welcome to a new school year!
One mom with two school-aged kids is also the junior senator from New York. Her name is Kirsten Gillibrand. In her book, Off the Sidelines, she says if you ask a mother how it’s going, the universal answer is “Um, barely holding it together.”
So you’re in good company with parents everywhere.
But my job is not to depress you. It’s to inspire you.
Since we often meet at the Palos Verdes Library, my theme this year is good books. And it’s a complement to the theme of this year’s president, Francine Mathieson – Be the Good.
And while you don’t need yet another thing to do, how many of you would like to:
Increase your concentration and improve your memory?
Connect better with people on an emotional level?
Feel happier, calmer and less stressed?
Then reading, as little as six minutes a day, can help you do that.
It showed reading was better at lowering stress than a number of other activities, such as listening to music, taking a walk, drinking tea or playing a video game.
Reading focuses your mind and crowds out worries – with no hangover, extra calories or other bad side effects. What could be better?
Thanks to Debra Young-Stearns and her team, you have a reminder bookmark on your chair about keeping calm and reading a good book.
The next time we meet at the library, visit the new releases section. It’s like being in a bookstore and walking out with every new book you want – for free!
There’s also a great new book out by Brené Brown called Rising Strong. You may have watched her popular TED talks or read her books. Her new book is about resilience and bouncing back from adversity.
I first heard Brené when I was driving to Lake Arrowhead a year ago to meet our very own Beth Graziano and other friends for a family weekend. And I have a feeling Brené and Beth would be the best of friends.
My life was busy, so I drove up by myself after the rest of the group. And I found the TED talk playlists to keep me company – pick a topic and you’ll be entertained by 18-minute talk after talk for several hours.
The last one as I wound my way up the mountain was called The Power of Vulnerability. With more than 21 million views, it has struck a universal chord.
I closed with a few words from Brené’s talk. About our children being wired and ready for struggle and being worthy of love and belonging. And about believing that “we are enough.”
Because, as Brown says, “when we work from a place that says, ‘I am enough,’ we’re kinder and gentler to the people around us, and we’re kinder and gentler to ourselves.”
I am enough. You are enough. Enjoy this beautiful season.
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